How to Flirt with a Girl Over Text or in Person-The Ultimate Guide


1. Don’t rush the texting

You want to come off as a confident guy. A guy that has stuff going on in your life.

There is no reason to reply the second she gets back to you. Let her wait. 

Robert Greene in his book, The Art of Seduction, writes that rushing is what destroys seduction. What he says applies to everything.

If you’re talking to a girl take it slow, be generous with your time. There is no reason to force yourself into her life.

This is especially obvious with texting. Give her a minute or 2 before you get back to her. 

Never rush, but if you are getting really flirty with her and it’s getting mildly sexual then don’t wait 5 minutes before you get back to her. You want to raise the temperature.

But that doesn’t mean that you can rush while text

But that doesn’t mean that you can rush while texting.

You’ll notice guys that are insecure are always busy, hurrying somewhere and they text back right away, dropping whatever they are doing. Insecure guys are not OK with themselves.

But you are different.

You love and accept yourself.

That’s why you take it nice and easy. And nice and easy doesn’t need to be slow. 

In addition, the more time that you take to get back to her the more time that she will be thinking about you. 

The more that she thinks about you she will start to fantasize about what kind of man you really are. She will see you as her dream man.

This is why I always tell guys to exude a degree of mystery about themselves so that girls can use their imagination to fill in the rest. [2, 3]

When she texts you back, take your time, think about her and what she would want she would want to hear. This drives girls crazy.

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I took this course when I couldn’t figure out why I couldn’t get a girl to sleep with me. I legit didn’t know what was wrong with me.

I could not flirt for the life of me. But this course taught me the exact principles to build that rock solid confidence.

My transformation didn’t come right away, but now I get nearly any girl that I want. Married, has a boyfriend, or even a model. 

Keep reading and you’ll find out what course I’m talking about.

12.Live An Interesting Life

No, I didn’t forget the topic of our discussion, “how to flirt with a girl”. It’s all connected. When you live an interesting life like going outdoor to invlove in camping activities or exploring new things, you will find lots of interesting things happening around you. Boom, new pictures and content to your messages!.


4. Keep some mystery:

Mystery is something very powerful when it comes to flirting with a girl.

With mystery, you arouse her curiosity.

You arouse her interest.

By keeping some mystery, you allow her to make up stories in her head.

You allow her to think about exciting stuff in order to fill the gaps you left by not revealing everything about yourself and your intentions.

Conversely, if there’s no mystery, be it about yourself or your intentions, things get much less exciting.

So try not to reveal too much.

Focus on the girl. Make the conversation about her or the situation, not about you.

And when she asks you a question about yourself, keep your answer short. Leave some suspense.

8. Compliment her

How did I wait till now to talk about this. This is essential for texting girls in any situation, not only flirting. You’ve got to compliment any girl that you are with.

Make her feel special. Make her feel lovable. Make her feel desirable. 

You are laying the foundation for flirting. This makes the girl feel open and happy to be with you.

A lot of guys say that compliments are for needy guys or ‘simps’. Here is the thing: it’s not about what you do or say, it’s how you do it.

The needy guy will say the same thing that the confident guy would say, but the girl will completely ignore the needy guy. Why can’t the needy guy flirt?

It’s because he lacks the confidence to say it in a way that makes the girl feel like she is prettier or smarter. 

When a compliment comes from a confident guy, he means it and the girl doesn’t feel that he’s just trying to get something from her.

Try to be as specific as possible. Don’t just text her “you looked pretty last night.”

You’d be much better off telling her exactly what was pretty. Was it her eyes, nails, or hair?

Tell her how her beauty made your body react. Tell her that you couldn’t stop staring at her lips and it was her fault. [10]

The Go and Come Back

Possibly my favorite trick when I’m trying to be flirty. You simply go for a while and come back shortly. It makes it seem as if she’s not your number one priority and you have other things to do. No it doesn’t ruin the flirting, it actually makes it stronger.

Once you’ve established a connection with her, get up and go talk to another friend or take a walk around the social event. In the meantime, you can think of things to talk about with her or go get a confidence boost from a friend.

Another trick I’ll use is walking past her and squeezing the side of her belly. She knows I’m thinking about her as I walk by and I get a little tease/touch action.

This does only work when there are other people around so utilize it if you can.

8.Update Her With Pictures

“A Picture is worth a thousand words.” If you have any picture that shows you doing funny things, turn it to be content for your flirting.

If you see a duck sitting in your garage, capture it to your mobile. Now you got one more thing to initiate a conversation.

14. How to flirt with a girl online:

Whether you’re wondering how to flirt with a girl on Instagram, how to flirt with a girl on Facebook, how to flirt with a girl on a dating app, or how to flirt with a girl on chat more generally, what you need to understand is that on these kinds of channels, there are a lot of flirting techniques you won’t be able to implement.

On a chat, you can’t use your gaze, you can’t use your cheeky smile, you can’t use physical proximity, and you can’t physically push her away…

So what can you do?

You can tease her.

And you can compliment her.

You can tease her on some stuff she writes, on some of her pics, on some element of her bio…

Just as you would in a real face-to-face conversation.

In order to not make the girl confused or feel ins

In order to not make the girl confused or feel insulted, don’t forget to use a smiley face when it’s not obvious that you’re teasing her ;).

As for the compliments, you can compliment her using one of her pics or something she told you about her. For instance:

“Nice legs.” (if she has nice legs)

“I like your belly.” (if she has a flat belly)

“A lawyer…hmmm, you must be quite smart ;)” (if you saw on her bio that she is a lawyer)

Don’t be afraid to compliment the girl on her physique.

These are actually the kind of compliments I prefer, since they are much more sexual than the usual compliments people will make to her.

Note that it’s important that your compliment be genuine, since it’ll allow you to deliver it in a much more natural and authentic manner.

Be Confident No Matter What

If you want to know how to flirt with any girl, at least focus on this tip.

Easier said than done I know. However, you’re not losing anything out of this. The more she realizes that you’re not trying so hard, the more you will both feel comfortable talking.

Stand up tall, act like yourself, and don’t be afraid to make the moves that you want to make. Now by that, I don’t mean kiss her as soon as you feel like it. What I mean is if you want to give her a little touch on the shoulder or pull her out to dance don’t hesitate.

If you notice you’re more confident with a friend next to you, use one. Not as a wingman, but because it might be easier to start conversation or if one of your jokes fails you have a friend who gets it.

Best Pick Up Lines for Her

1. I think there is something wrong with my eyes: I can’t take them off of you. 

2. I need to cross the street. Would you mind holding my hand? 

3. Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?

4. I think I need a map: I keep getting lost in your eyes.

5. I knew love at first sight was real when I saw you.

6. I would fall for you even in zero gravity.

7. If you were a song, you would be my favorite track.

8. The sparkle is so bright in your eyes–the sun is jealous.

9. I just won hide and seek because I found you.

10. Your beauty makes me appreciate being able to see.

11. Looking at you made me forget my pick up line.

12. If you were a triangle, you would be an acute one.

13. You looked familiar, but then I remembered I had only seen you in my dreams.

14. I am no photographer, but I can picture you and me together.

15. Feel my shirt; it is made of boyfriend material.

16. I am going to call you Google because you are everything I am searching for.

17. Can I follow you? I was told to follow my dreams.

18. Can I be the Romeo to your Juliet?

19. I just checked the crystal ball, and it says you are in my future.

20. So what do you do besides take my breath away? 

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First date

Let’s say you’re meeting a girl on the

Let’s say you’re meeting a girl on the first date or just approached her for the first time.  Simply start asking a girl about her life.  If you already know her, then bring up something she’s told you before and ask her how that’s going.

Begin conversation

The first step to flirting is just to start the conversation.  Like any other normal conversation.  She walks into the bar, you say what’s up.  Or she’s coming over to your place, so you let her in and ask her how her day was.

Get deeper in conversation

We’re not trying to go super deep right now.  You just want to ask her about her life.

  • Her family, friends, hobbies, job, and so on.
  • Then one of the best flirting topics / topics in general, which is travel.
  • I’ve never met a woman who doesn’t love traveling or doesn’t have a wishlist of places she wants to see.

You’ll being out a whole bunch of positive emotions from her travels.  And if she hasn’t traveled much, you’re getting insight into her dreams.

With your body, mannerisms, and touch

Much of what I just talked about seemed like norma

Much of what I just talked about seemed like normal conversation.   That’s because if you put the conversation on paper, it might seem normal or weird given the context.

But much of the actual flirting comes from physical things.  No, she’s not going to grab your dick in public.  However, she might touch your arm when she’s laughing at your joke.

Things you can do

A few things you can actually do when flirting with her

  1. Smile when you joke
  2. lightly tough her
  3. face her with your body

1. Smile when you make a joke

It’s good to be playful with her and give her shit.

But you can’t be a robot about it.  When a girl talks about a guy and says he’s “a jerk”, but says it with a smile on her face… she really means “he was able to joke with me like a human being and not worship me.”

Over texts, joking too much can be interpreted the wrong way.  So when you’re in person, you can be more of yourself and joke with her more.

2. Lightly touch her

A light bump to the shoulder, a small touch on her leg or arm, and so on.  Nothing crazy, small touches or bumps.  This ins’t at all necessary.  However, you can do this with girls to show some interest.  If she bumps you back then she’s flirting with you back.

3. Face her with your body

Many men try too hard to be alpha and face away. 

Many men try too hard to be alpha and face away.  When you’re learning how to flirt with a girl, keep the attention on her. Face your body towards hers.  This is indirect, but shows that you have interest with her.

As a man with a prupose, your attention is limited.  You’re not texting these girls back 24/7 or always chilled with them. But when you do hang with them, like on a first date or the first approach, you give them focused attention.

Girls like when you give them attention.  If you literally gave them no attention at all, then you would completely ignore them and never date or interact with them.

It’s only giving them the wrong kind of attention that causes you to be the beta or be friendzoned.  Giving them your sexual attention when there’s mutual interest is fine.  Don’t over do it.  Be chill, cool, and radiate good vibes and sexual attention.

What to watch for in her

You want to see if she also smiles, touches you, and is facing you with her body.  If she’s doing the same things, then congrats, you’re flirting.

If she’s not smiling, not doing any light touches, and not facing you, then she’s probably not interested.  Some women are more shy and conservative, nothing wrong with that.  However, if you flirt with a girl and she likes you, she’s going to reciprocate in some fashion, even if she’s more shy.

The biggest one is touch and smiling.  Even a girl whose more reserved will smile or at least blush around you if you flirt with her and she’s into it.

About the vibe – Don’t memorize lines or techniques

Although you can keep in mind the examples I gave above, you can’t force them.  They’re not random techniques to use whenever.

Learning how to flirt with a girl is more about being able to feel the vibe.  Like I said before, women are all about feeling. You have to use the right side of your brain.  It’s about being cool, calm, yet quick on your feet and witty.  Most importantly, it’s about mindsets.

Tease her a little bit, just don’t  go overboard

This mindset doesn’t mean you’re being.  Instead, it means you’re giving her shit on small things.  For example, I was on a date the other day.  The girl has ripped jeans near her knees.  They were obviously styled like that.

But then she mentioned how she hurt one of her knees playing volleyball.  I gave her shit and said “wow, I can tell because you messed up your jeans”.  I said this with a smile on my face and touched her knee.

She was laughing and touched my arm back.  She clearly wasn’t offended that I was mocking her outfit.  This is because context is so important.  If you can nail down the mindsets, then the words and touch will come naturally.

More Tips on How to Flirt With A Girl

Getting the girl has never been easier if you follow our other awesome articles.

  1. Make talking to girls easier with our post on how to talk to girls.
  2. We can also teach you how to ask a girl out if you’re struggling there.
  3. Knowing how to get a girl to like you is easier than you think.

How to flirt with a girl over text?:

Most of the conversations and things start over a text, nowadays. So, it’s really important to have good communication and flirting with a guy you’re interested in! Cause there is no other way to let him know that you like him or something, right? Do not worry, know the texts you can deliver and make the guy feel special.  Good Morning, You!   Morning texts are romantic,

  • Good Morning, You!
    • Morning texts are romantic, waking up to sweet messages is always good.
  • You like an actress in your display picture!
    • Any compliment would work.
  • How do I Look?
    • Share your pictures, ask her opinions on them. She’ll feel special.
  • Praise!
    • Always praise her for things you’ve seen her doing online. Example: The way she dances or maybe her acting skills.
  • Tease her
    • Playfully tease her, talking about things she doesn’t like or about your exes, make sure it doesn’t get too personal otherwise change the topic.
  • Accidental Texts
    • Act as you texted accidentally, and then continue talking, Cause who’ll leave any chance?
  • Do not be boring!
    • Stay interested and interesting in whatever you’re both talking about.
  • Late Replies leading to “Sorry, I was changing…”
    • Ooh! She’ll have a lot of things to wonder about now.
  • A question at a time
    • Single question each time, do not cluster it all.
  • Do not use “k”, “lol” or texts like these
    • It’ll surely give wrong signals to your crush, that you don’t wanna talk or something.
  • Ask her out?
    • If you’re getting all the vibes, feel free to ask her out on a date.
  • Flatter
    • Use all the compliments you can think of and flatter her as much as you can.
  • Use Emoticons
    • Expressing the emotions using emoticons would be better!

Why is FlirtingSo Important?

via:  Unsplash / Joanna Nix

via: Unsplash / Joanna Nix

You can approach a girl and simply ask her any of our questions to ask a girl, but that’s a boring way to start a conversation.

Those questions are meant to create a dialogue, while flirting is meant to get you an invitation to said dialogue. A girl isn’t going to talk to you unless it’s clear you have something to offer her.

…And one thing you can offer her:

A fun and interesting interaction. Well it just so happens that flirting is a surefire way of doing exactly that.

Flirt with women 

Life is too short not to know how to flirt with a girl.  Remember, the key is to be playful.  Let the girl talk.  Use a lot of eye contact.  Joke with her.

Work on getting her comfortable, and have confidence in that you’re a man she would want to flirt with.

All women need some flirting from a fun guy.  So stop being the lame dude who’s boring like a rock. You should be a rock emotionally.  But you should be able to have sexual vibes with a woman you like.  Be the cool guy she want to flirt with, and better yet actually date.  Go on more dates, figure out how to flirt with a girl effectively, and have more fun in your dating life.

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